My office is big and quiet and mostly empty, with the exception of Bright Eyes rollin on Pandora, and the occasional sneak peak at last week's episode of Grey's. Yesterday I was slammed at work, and as stressful as it can be, I often prefer it to the long affairs of denim on cotton padding, where I just sit and stare and wish for something more important to do.
All that I can wish for in a future career is something that matters. I just want to matter- to someTHING or to someONE. I mean, I suppose I make life a little easier for my boss, so I must matter a little. I mean, how would he ever make all those copies by himself? And at I-Sat I'm sure lots of people are extremely grateful that I introduced Dish Network into their lives. How did they ever live with regular analog cable before the days of free DVR and an interactive menu???
I think I may go to China next year. Afton, Libby, and I were all brainstorming about it... and I think I might really be serious about it. If they are not, they should probably back down now- cuz once I start planning I can get a little out of control. But basically there is this program that pays you to go teach and live there. They pay half your plane ticket for staying a semester (and the whole thing for a whole year... but I think I'm only up for a mini session for now), all of your housing while you are there, cover most food expenses, AND provide a salary every month. PLUS you can live with your friends and teach at the same school. Umm.. amazing, maybe?
It wouldn't be until February of next year so I can't be getting all crazy about it just yet or anything. But I just think it could be SO COOL. Plus- if I went to Europe in 2007, Africa in 2008, and then Asia in 2009... I would probably be like the coolest person ever. K, not quite-- but I would be one step closer to all my big dreams and aspirations (number 1 being visit every continent by the time I am 30).
It's like I want to see EVERYTHING for a brief landscape, and then take all the little bits and pieces from all the different places and things I experience, and then form them all together to figure out exactly where I fit into all of it, and what I'm supposed to do with my life. The truth is I'm just not ready to settle down, not ready to buckle into a career. Really just not ready to face the fact I'm growing up I suppose. I enjoy being older and having more freedom and more responsibility and all that... I mean it's not like I want to stay a kid forever. Maybe it's not so much that I don't want to grow up- it's that I don't want to just fall into the status quo of what growing up usually means. I don't mean the getting married and having a (real) job part.. I fully anticipate that eventually I will do both. But I just don't want a normal family, or a normal job, or to live in a normal little house in the suburbs. So for now, I'm perfectly content with just continuing the journey of a nomad.
In the meantime, any suggestions for September-January? No reason that the traveling interim can't become a little adventure of its own. Requests or recommendations?
About Me
things i love
- fruit binges, running, politics, Obama, orange sunsets, everything Africa, snowboarding, sunshine, night capps, attempting vegetarianism, flip-flops, gelato, Euro cities, good-ness, accents, mix CDs, redbox, long phone calls, tanning, nice friends, political "discussions", film, my funny family, the internet, and discovering God
3 comments:
welp, i suggested the china thing to you- even though you already had decided to do that. also, you're going to africa. i think i may empty out my bank account and leave the country and wander for a couple of years goood byeee
girl, I think China would be amazing. and don't worry about not wanting to buckle down into a career...do whatchu want for as long as you can and as long as you want. i wish i wasnt so into me career right now, i want that freedom and want to escape for months at a time. which is hopefully what i will be able to do when i become an agent...but we'll see. bills suck! keep as little of them as possible. china would be great. i'd def look into it.
also...as for making a difference, or having what you do matter...i struggle with that as well. at work i do make a difference to the ppl i train and help, but whatever who really cares about insurance. I think you just have to be involved in other things, besides work, that make a difference...finding the ideal job would b better tho...but lets face it, those jobs dont pay jack.
ok, the end. love you.
is it bad that i don't EVER want a future career? like also these people say "do what you want while you still can" well, thanks but i plan on doing it always. i know real life will come bite me in the butt eventually but why do i have to prove to everyone i'm a graduated adult by having a 9 to 5 somewhere?!
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